The Day I Became a Jew

I woke up Sunday morning in hopes of trimming my football story inside the main San Diego Library.  That is until I heard a voice inside the stall shower of the YMCA. HE said, "Go to the little shop that plays synagogue today. It is eight thirty on Saturday.  
  Well I never go against HIS word. Whatever I felt like doing, I scrubbed for the church that wore a skull hat. I walked the entire mile to the little store front on Third and Island street in downtown San Diego.  I wished to know more about our Torah but Cantor Shlomo never came. 
   And you'll never guess what happened. I opened up a book about the Old Testament and the name of Gershom,  my Hebrew name, looked up at me. I put my head into book and studied the laws of Moses. Well, it felt good doing HIS command. 
   A few more people arrived and then there was ten. It meant we had a minion and  could proceed with our religious business of the day. Sam the Taxi Man arrived and smiled. There was Steve, Howard and a few others. Something hit me on my head. I looked up and it was the bearded one, or - the Rabbi. The long bearded one spoke. 
   "Give me your weaker arm...take off your watch Gershom! ...Let me show you how to wrap this tape over your arm seven times." Why the last time a man touched me was my Dad many moons ago. It felt strange but who could resist. It had been a long time since my blood pressure had been taken. 
   "Now Gershom, doon't move your head...There."Now I had a tiny box on my forehead and also my arm. 
   But it was what the bearded one said on Saturday that kept my mind busy  Sunday in San Diego. I will try to paraphrase the one who wore a long black robe. 
   "When is a friend a friend?" He read a scripture from the bible. 
   "When somebody does a favor and expects one from you,  he is a fraud. One who gives unconditionally is a true friend."  Then the Reb hit me where it hurts. It convinced me that I never had any relationship with Gloria. 
   "A good relationship is a mix of ingredients that make for a perfect marriage. Nothing is expected of you and your relationship sizzles with time -- much like marinating a piece of meat." 

   Would you believe I spent the the entire Saturday at the Synagogue also But it was my mixing with God that mattered. That's when  I became a Jew